The Christmas season has come and gone. We survived it relatively unscathed. I have a very functional dysfunctional family and any holiday season that we get through with little to no drama is a success in my books.
This was the first Christmas that I actually had moments when I just thought "what is the point". Run around buying gifts, stocking stuffers and groceries. Wrap all items, bake goodies, decorate the house, decorate the tree and put out "Santa items". Then fall into unconsciousness and wake up the next morning to unwrap the same items you were up to the wee hours of the morning making look pretty. Recycle all of the boxes, cardboard, gift wrap. Cook, eat and collapse.
My son is fifteen now. We don't have the same excitement about "Santa" that we did even two or three years ago. He is a fairly grounded kid who asks for reasonable things. When your child only asks for one or two items...there isn't exactly a huge amount of surprise on Christmas Day. Sure he was happy to get what he asked for but it wasn't "unexpected" either.
I think I would have been "happier" to spend my time brightening Christmas for others who maybe didn't expect anything. I think that the true JOY that I usually have is experiencing the "surprise" that someone has over receiving something "unexpected". This of course is not to say that I want to receive a kayak paddle next year (though it would be unexpected because I don't own a kayak). Just that I miss the wonder and anticipation that use to permeate the holiday season. My favourite present this year was a "teeny weeny martini set". A shaker, two glasses and stir sticks that would fit in a doll house. It even had a very small recipe book. It probably cost less than $20 and it completely entranced me. So it's not about how much you spend, its about how much thought you put into the gift.
I'm considering spending next Christmas somewhere warm with the people I love and foregoing gifts all together. I don't want to go through the rituals of the expected actions, participating in the expected events, giving and receiving the expected gifts and experiencing the expected let down or holiday hang over.
I still need to dredge up the required energy to take down the tree and decorations. This weekend I hope...unless the amazing Katitude calls and says she wants to spend the weekend being spontaneous or perfecting martini recipes. Then all bets are off and maybe my husband and son can "deal" with the holiday clean up.
I'll cross my fingers.
Happy Holidays everyone...I promise to pull myself out of this post-Christmas funk soon.
7 hours ago